In a portfolio career, requests have a funny way of multiplying. A speaking gig here, a board invite there, a coffee catch-up that sounds valuable but drains you for days. The answer to all of them is technically "yes" right up until the moment it isn't. 

Katie is 18 months into consulting and a portfolio career, and she came to me with a problem a lot of people share: she's getting busier, she cares deeply about protecting time for values-driven work, and saying no is a muscle she's still building. 

This episode is part of The Work Edit, a format on How I Work where I sit down with someone facing a real professional challenge and we work through it together live. 

We cover my yes triage framework, the no club concept, the to-don't list, the never again list, and a simple rule called the next Tuesday test. 

Katie and I discuss:

• The yes triage: three questions to run every request through before deciding, and why you need a "hell yes" to at least two of them 

• Why saying yes out of flattery or guilt is so common, and how to catch yourself doing it 

• The no club: how a small group of trusted colleagues can give you the objective perspective you can't give yourself 

• The to-don't list and how to use it monthly to protect your energy from the things you already know drain you 

• The never again list for the spectacularly bad decisions you keep forgetting you made 

• Why a slow no is not polite and why a fast no within 24 hours is almost always the kinder move 

• The next Tuesday test: how to reality-check a far-off commitment by imagining it was happening this week 

Key quotes 

"A slow no is actually unkind because the other person is just waiting and probably following up when they could already be finding someone who'll say yes." 

"What all these strategies do is reduce cognitive load. There's no longer a decision to make. There's just a rule to follow."