You’re not lazy. You’re just out of oranges.

A friend of mine once told me his orange theory (and I am talking about the fruit, not the fitness craze). His girlfriend was working crazy hours at the time and had no energy to give to the relationship because she had used it all up at work. He told me, ‘It’s like she wakes up and has 12 oranges to squeeze the juice from. She goes to work, she uses up all her oranges at work, and when she comes home to me at night, she has no juice left to give.’

We talk about work as if it’s something you do during the day, then return to your actual life at night. But for many people, work doesn’t just take time. It takes all your oranges. And it sends you home with the peel (which is pretty useless, unless you are grating some zest for a salad).

This week on How I Work, I spoke with Cherie Clonan, founder and CEO of The Digital Picnic. Cherie was diagnosed with autism as an adult, and we spoke about the masking that many neurodivergent people have to do at work.

Masking is the effort of constantly monitoring yourself so you fit in. Reading the room. Interpreting tone. Checking you’ve understood correctly. Adjusting how much of yourself you show. Then doing it again in the next meeting.

Cherie said that if you’ve ever finished a day of back-to-back meetings and felt completely cooked, imagine that feeling multiplied by four. That’s what some people are doing every day, just to get through work appearing “fine”.

She gave an example from a recent wedding. Loud music. Lots of small talk. Sensory overload. Every so often, she’d walk out to her car, sit in silence for ten minutes, then go back in. She did it repeatedly because it was the only way to stay functional.

Unfortunately, most workplaces assume a very narrow version of a “normal” human. Bright lights. Constant noise. Surprise meetings. Back-to-back calls. No recovery time.

Each one sounds minor. Together, they burn through oranges fast.

​In today's How I Work interview, Cherie describes Spoon Theory, which describes energy as a finite resource you wake up with each day. Different activities cost different numbers of spoons. When you run out, you don’t just feel tired. You're shattered.

Same idea. Different fruit (or utensil).

Cherie said to me: Businesses don’t fail when they run out of cash. They fail when founders run out of energy. (And I reckon the same could be said for teams failing when their leader runs out of energy).

Energy is what lets you think clearly, make good decisions, stay kind, have hard conversations, and keep perspective. When it goes, everything else follows.

The next time you feel depleted, instead of pushing harder, ask:

• Where are my oranges going?

• What’s costing more juice than it’s worth?

• What am I tolerating that no longer fits?

Because energy loss isn’t a personal failing. It’s data that you really need to act on.